Tesco To Take Poofs Out Of Shelves.
To you in the United States or Europe this name might not be terribly familiar, but here in Blighty Tesco is, very simply, everywhere. I never really understood why as I prefer Waitrose for quality and Sainsbury’s for value, but it takes all sorts…
Either way, Tesco is here probably better known than the Queen. For this reason, it was no small
provocation fact when such a company decided to unite its name to the Great Cause Of Sodomy.
A masterstroke, someone of dubious sexual orientation and/or of zero moral values must have thought: in one fell swoop we make ourselves oh so beautiful, polish our image with “the young” (who are supposed, of course, to be perverts and supporters of perversion) and get a huge boost in popularity at, in the end, very little cost compared with, say, a huge nationwide TV ad campaign.
It turns out the initiative wasn’t a masterstroke, the country was rather angry and let Tesco know what they thought of them, and an ocean of points was in danger of going down the drain whilst their owner simply walked elsewhere.
The entire exercise reminded one of the embarrassing Marks & Spencer initiative, with some – certainly below thirty – cretins promoting slogans like “Plan A, because there is no Plan B” and causing the loss of, I am sure, many clients beside yours truly.
Still, whilst Marks and Spencer deflated the environ-mental craze rather quietly and trying not to lose face, Tesco clearly couldn’t afford such a luxury in front of popular opposition, which must have been brutal and such as to demand a decided backpedaling. But how to ddo it? In these cases you are in front of a quandary: you must throw the fags out of the window without appearing to having sponsored them just because you were looking for some cheap publicity.
The result is, it appears, Tesco’s announcement of the last days: “we’ll be pro-sodomy until the next Pervert Pride event, after which we are going to sever our ties with organised sodomy”. Brilliantly stupid.
This is so embarrassing, it reminds one of “The Office”, and the flies on the walls of Tesco headquarters must have cringed, too. The Tesco PR, erm, cheesy poofs are basically saying to us their “values” have – pun not intended – a “best before” date.
Sorry boys – or however you “feel” – it just doesn’t work that way. Such a behaviour exposes your hypocrisy even more; it takes every doubt out of the most naive that you were just being the serfs of the public opinion, and the servants of Mammon.
This wasn’t little. And it certainly did not help.