Daily Archives: June 5, 2012
This “Vatileaks” matter does not cease to amaze me.
It seems there are even people who demand or suggest the Pope should resign, as if the Vatican had always been an immaculate garden full of delicate flowers, now invaded by weeds. Then there are the faithful who are shocked, probably because they know next to nothing of history and think corruption in the Church started around five months ago.
Then there are – and they are also not new, but they’re amazing nevertheless – those who seem to think the Church must make an effort to earn I do not say their approval, but even their allegiance. The latter group seems to think the Church is something like a political party, to which they can give their support or take it away.
It is, therefore, perhaps fitting to say a couple of words about the matter. This may seem stating the obvious to some (which it is, and the reason why I often do not even mention these matters) but might be of some benefits for others, perhaps more recent readers of this blog or stumbling on this page by the virtue of Google.
1. Corruption in the Church is as old as the Church herself. Even among the first batch of twelve – handpicked by Our Lord Himself, and with the immeasurable benefit of knowing Him in the flesh – the betrayal rate was one in six, though one repented so let’s settle for one in twelve, which is around 8.33%. Those who know what happened afterwards are, certainly, not very alarmed from what is happening now, at least as far as the degree of corruption is concerned. Benedict IX sold his papacy, for crying out loud!
2. The Church is not a party, but the bride of Christ. I am utterly astonished that those people who say they have left the Church because they disagree with Pope Benedict’s policies never say to you they don’t identify with their Fatherland anymore because they don’t like Obama (or Bush, or Merkel, or the Chameleon, or Berlusconi). They don’t say this to you, because they perfectly well know it would be a very childish thing to say, and would let them appear rather stupid. But hey, if it is about the Church of Christ, one can throw away the membership card as he likes…
3. Excessive worries are a sign of weak faith, because the Church is indefectible. As Cardinal Consalvi brilliantly told Napoleon, the clergy has been trying to destroy her from the start, and has never managed it. The idea the Church may be marching toward destruction is as intelligent as the fear of Asterix’ villagers the sky may be about to fall on their head. Of course, one has the right to be angry – and if you ask, has the duty to denounce the filth in an apposite manner – but let us never forget total defeat is not an option here, merely some more or less protracted phase of dismal military operations and shocking, if never definitive setbacks.
I sometimes forget to point out to these simple facts. I do this, because to me this is such a matter of course than it would not occur to me to remind you of this more than it would that tomorrow the sun will go up in the east.
Therefore, let us be attentive not to cover the scandals – oportet ut scandala eveniant is valid for the Church too – but at the same time let us not think that the Church is now suddenly in danger, or the sky is about to fall on our heads.
… or better said, the American Catholics do.
Whilst the film has possibly not been drummed up in Catholic homilies as it should have been, it is clear it has failed to catch the imagination of the US minds and wallets. The official numbers for the weekend are now out and they confirm the projections, forecasting a result which if it is not dismal, it is certainly disappointing.
Let us see some numbers. This film is a $20m production, and around 55% of gross sales remain in the hands of the producers. This means only to recover the costs this movie needs to gross around $45m. With the first weekend below $1.9m it is difficult to see this production to gross much more than three times that, or around $6m. If this happens, it means the biggest market on the planet – with 60 million Catholics and a raging controversy about religious freedom – did not manage to bring the producers more than 15% of the entire production costs, and forget the profits.
Granted, things might go better elsewhere: in Mexico, the film has already grossed the – for local standards, huge – amount of $ 3.2m, even defeating big Hollywood productions in its first weekend. But the story takes place in Mexico, and I cannot think this kind of success can be exported to the rest of Latin America.
Europe – if this film will ever come over here – will probably not be the source of great satisfaction either, as if the United Stated have failed to deliver on a film so near to the current political debate it is more than doubtful the old, tired and rather disinterested Europe will. Similarly, I can’t imagine many other countries to be so interested: the Philippines, perhaps?
Then there is the DVD/rental market, which will have money trickling in the tills for years, and the TV rights. And that’s that, really.
Now, it is clear this production will struggle to recover the costs, and even considering the risks of this business and the fact the industry accepts an awful lot of films will not bring any money I wonder how many of such productions we will be able to see in the future.
This is a bitter feeling, as one cannot escape the impression only one of these movies could contribute to change the political debate far more than all Catholic blogs you can care to think of, and if there was a right moment for a film like this it was now, in late Spring 2012.
Still, not all is black. The numbers were bad, but not dismal. The film will probably manage to stay in a fair number of screens for a few more weeks, and might prove somewhat resilient. All in all, the sum of all gross revenues, DVD sales, rentals and TV market might – just might – persuade some production house to produce another film of this sort.
Still, it seems the price Americans are ready to pay for freedom is not very high after all.
Today is our Jubilee extra festivity and I have a lot of time to waste. Therefore, I have decided to write something about the curiosities of my statistics tables. Take it seriously, because it isn’t.
Like (I think) every blogger, I can’t avoid sniffing my statistics at times. Besides the obvious human curiosity, I am intrigued by the degree of penetration of Mundabor’s politically incorrect message in any particular country, that is: how many pageviews per, say, 1,000 inhabitants I get in, say, 30 days. Let us see, then, how things stand as we write the 5 June 2012.
Unsurprisingly, English-speaking countries top the absolute numbers list: in the last 30 days I got (as I write) 14,232 pageviews from the United States, 9,170 from the United Kingdom, 1,786 from Canada and 1,667 from Australia. If we calculate this per 1 million inhabitants in 30 days I get: 45.4 for the United States, 152.8 for the United Kingdom, 51.3 for Canada and 72.4 for Australia. This means Canadians and even Australians are more likely to be followers of your humble correspondent than those living in the Home Of The Brave, and the loyal subjects of the Queen solidly lead the provisional table of the Mundabor-clicking countries.
But then, the surprises begin: Germany has 8.55 pageviews per million inhabitant and 30 days. In part this is due to many Germans mastering English rather well (well: “vell”), though I wonder whether British expatriates do not play a role here. Even more surprising is Italy’s 9.11, as not so many Italians speak English well (including myself, of course) and the expatriates’ presence is certainly not very big; though there are still, I think, some American soldiers.
More surprises: Sweden has a staggering 38; which – considering Christianity is almost unknown over there, and Catholicism basically resting on the odd immigrant – leads me to think they are either looking for pictures, or else they think “Mundabor” is the title of some indecent film. They can’t be clicking whilst drunk, though, because this would be far too expensive.
Belgium is, with 30.7, also a big surprise. I have written a couple of times about Belgium (see my shocking experience in Bruges), but I have decided to put this extremely good number down to frustrated Belgians who have the pockets full of paedophile priests and stupid prelates. They make wonderful chocolate, too.
Other countries disappoint: Russia has a dismal 0.87 pageviews per one million inhabitants every 30 days and I am really, really angry at them. Of course, this might be due to poor English and scarce internet connections in their immense countryside, but I truly think they should drink less vodka and click around more sensibly (I am fully unconcerned about this, mind, as I have already told you they barely ever click my pages).
Pleasant surprises come from some rare Muslim countries, probably because of the numerous expatriates living there, or perhaps because they are attracted by my beautiful depictions of the child-rapist bloody bastard they keep calling “prophet”. What shall I say: it’s a good thing this blog is anonymous. Let us see the numbers: Qatar has a more than respectable 11.6, the United Arab Emirates 13.9 (which puts both of them ahead of Germany and Italy), and the “Abode of Peace” (this is how Brunei calls itself) a rather staggering 282.5, which puts them solidly at the top of the provisional ranking of Mundabor-loving (or at least: clicking) countries. Please compare with the 1.15 of Saudi Arabia, and I thank those courageous (probably expatriates) people who risk losing the odd limb in a dirty dungeon after being found clicking my blog whilst the Foreign and Commonwealth Office invites the Saudis to negotiations (the US citizens must be, on the other hand, rather safe…). Please delete every trace of your visits here, folks, and use a proxy if you can.
Venezuela also disappoints with exactly 1, which is a pity considering all the beautiful women they have, and must be due to Chavez making of them such paupers they can’t afford the fast internet connection my image-laden site requires. Talking of beautiful women, the Czechs behave rather better with an excellent 20.4, certainly helped by the good knowledge of the language.
Israel fares rather well with 14.4, whilst their soon-to-be-bombed friends in Iran disappoint with 0.03 (zero point zero three) pageviews per 1 million inhabitant and 30 days. This lets Saudi Arabia appear a modern democracy, and I suspect my blog isn’t much loved by the local internet watchdogs. Take this, you bastards…
Speaking about angry Muslims, Denmark has a surprisingly high 40.9, and in the absence of any widespread Catholicism there I do think many of the clicks come because of the (yes, you got it right) paedophile bloody bastard…
But I am boring you, and you will have been wondering for a while (if you are still here, of course) which country is the winner of this extremely relevant, heart-stopping, planet-changing competition. I will not leave you in this unbearable state of suspense anymore, and the winner is……
The Stato della Citta’ del Vaticano, or Vatican City State, with all of 10 pageviews in the last 30 days out of an official population of…. 832, including the valet and all the leakers. This gives our friends, if my calculations are correct, the staggering number of 12,019.2 pageviews per 1 million inhabitants per 30 days. This is – statistically – the same as having 3,762,009 pageviews from the United States in 30 days. My thanks go here to the Duce, whose far-sightedness was decisive in allowing me the achievement of such an astonishing statistical number.
That’s it, folks: I have given you a glimpse of the statistical life of a minuscule, but bravely fighting blog, and hope I haven’t bored you too much.
One day we will conquer Iran, too.
Reblog of the day
Extremely interesting post on Linen on the Hedgerow about the striking similarity of the devastations caused by Queen Elisabeth I on one side and post V II liberal Catholics on the other.
From the stripping of altars to the mutilation of liturgy, and from the promotion of the usual suspects to the neutralisation of uncomfortable priests, the methods of post V II liberal clergymen seem to take inspiration – if, forcibly, in a less violent way – from the ones used by the sovereign the senseless hypocrisy of the time called “the virgin Queen”.
This is, indeed, an interesting but not a surprising observation, if we but observe that in both cases the aim was to gradually protestantise the relevant organisation. The extent of the operation is easy to be seen, today, in many secondary but not irrelevant details, like the smiling priest greeting everyone after Mass as if he…
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A great example of love to duty and Fatherland. A strong belief in God, and attachment to family. The woman of one man. An unwavering loyalty and commitment to an easily tempted husband. A graceful and reassuring presence on every occasion. A symbol of a country now rapidly disappearing, in which one’s feeling of duty comes before one’s personal satisfaction. Extremely scrupulous in fulfilling her role, but able to take a stance when her scandalous daughter-in-law was about to be canonised by the bout of hysteria of a brainless generation.
Exemplary, in every way.
God bless you, Ma’am.