Francis Pulling A Benedict? Not So Fast!

There we go again.

Apparently, this day you can’t visit L’Aquila (and it would seem strange, to me, that a Pope would visit L’Aquila and not stop and pray on the tomb of a Pope buried there) without the Press starting to fantasise about your abdication.

Let me curb your enthusiasms right there: if you ask me, it’s not going to happen. Not now, not for the foreseeable future.

Let me explain why:

1. Francis is drunk on power. An abdication would put the kibosh on what he loves to do most: lord it over his dependents, and over the faithful, with reckless abandon. No more persecution of faithful religious orders, no more persecution of the laton Mass, no more enjoying the anger of Catholics when he promotes degenerates to the bishopric or the cardinalate! Could he live without that? Me neither…
2. Francis loves the fame and the attention. This is not necessary ten years old Francis. This is, rather, six years old Francis. He just loves the journalists, and the photo ops, and all the fawning around him. Heresy Pimp loves his Presstitutes.
3. An abdication would be a real danger for his comfortable life. God being, as Francis well known, “full of surprises”, he could never be sure the that conclave does not end with a guy transforming himself, at very short notice, as a Scourge of Heresy. At that point, the wheelchair would be the last of his problems. From a very dark cell in a very hot place in the middle of the Pampa, to trial and defrocking, all bets would be off. Imagine that!
4. Francis doesn’t like Benedict. What do they do, all day, two emeriti in the same apartment? If they play chess, Benedict will win all the time. If they play Chequers, Benedict will also win all the time. If Benedict talks to him about Theology, Francis will not understand a word. Similarly, Benedict will soon tire of an old man only able to talk about his own sciatica. Not happening.

What would, then, make the man decide that it is better to abdicate? I can only see two reasons: 1. an attempt to influence the choice of his successor, and 2. more notoriety and more attention than by remaining in charge.

The first is not happening, as even Francis must realise. Once he has abdicated, his bullying superpowers go down to zero and suddenly stop, like a non-Duracell bunny in the battery ad.

The second is highly, highly improbable. This is no Lady Diana. This is no Meghan Markle, either. Heck, this guy reminds one more of Amber Heard! If it’s known that he is slowly dying, proper Catholics will hope he stops doing damage fast, and all others will not even say a prayer, dedicate to him half a second of their time, and proceed to write their next Facebook post about the Ukraine.

Well, I don’t see it happening, is all.

I am afraid we will have to wait for the old funeral.