The news of John L. Allen Jr’ s departure from one of the most horrible rags on the planet is the stuff of nice jokes around the Internet.
Mind, it is not that Allen can be considered in any way acceptable for a sound Catholic; it is that his colleagues are such nutcases that one is tempted to think God uses that rag to show us a complete collection of reprobates, so that we may be warned.
Rex monoculus in terra caecorum, my forefathers used to say: in the land of the blind, the one with one eye is the King. Allen used to smuggle himself for a reasonable Catholic voice merely because he worked in the madhouse. Put him in the middle of other confused wannabe Catholics unfaithful to the Magisterium and he will emerge for what he is: just another confused wannabe Catholic unfaithful to the Magisterium. He has occasional bouts of reason, showing he is not entirely bad. But seriously, in any decent Catholic publication he would fly out of the window in no time.
The atrocious rag for which he wrote up to now (no, I will not grace them with a link) will, though, have a problem. He was the token sane man in their psychiatric hospital; the one who brought them the traffic from the world of people who actually think, and their only link with sanity. With Allen gone, the place will become the editorial equivalent of Animal House, without even a John Belushi to attract the visitors.
The NCR needs another monoculus, fast. They certainly can’t afford to be seen by everyone for what they are: a bunch of ridiculous nutcases making the work of the devil day in and day out, and on their way to hell.
I wish them, editorially speaking, death as a magazine and Internet presence.
My wish has now come, very probably, nearer to fulfilment.
John Allen is generally the only one among the bunch of heretics writing for the National Schismatic Reporter who manages to write pieces of acceptable fairness and quality. I think he is, in fact, the token Catholic of the magazine, useful to avoid immediate and serious trouble with Rome. Not later than a couple of days ago I have linked to an article written by him.
Today, though, Allen shows a terrifying ignorance, a deplorable abuse of intoxicating substances or, most likely, a shocking disingenuousness that should not remain unnoticed or uncommented.
Speaking of the next Pope, Allen writes (and I quote): “No matter what happens, the church almost certainly won’t reverse its ban on abortion, gay marriage or women priests”.
Firstly, Mr Allen should be aware that he is not writing about the small church at the corner, but of the Only Church, which must correctly be written with a capital C lest the uninformed think she isn’t the only one.
More importantly, though, Mr Allen is shamelessly pandering to the heretics reading his rag when he indicates they are allowed to think it might be legitimate, or even thinkable, to imagine the Church might one day change the vary basis of Her infallible teaching.
Such expressions should actually be enough to deprive this infamous rag of its right to call itself “Catholic”. Let’s hope it happens not before long, and not one day too soon.
Mr Allen certainly knows better, and should be ashamed.
But then again people who know what shame is don’t write for that indecent rag.