As I speak, the United Kingdom is living the aftermath of a shocking bloodbath. Not entirely a genocide, but certainly a mass murder. No, let me correct it: a public mass execution, Tyburn Tree-style, but multiple times.
Since yesterday evening, when the first exit poll were published, there had been rumours of an incumbent massacre. It was everywhere. Not even the pollsters could believe it.
The LibDems denied vehemently. It cannot be, they said. We are so good, people can't treat us this way. Think of all the “gays” to whom we have told “their love is worth as much as anyone else's”. No, it cannot be. We cannot be massacred in that way. Ten Members of Parliament remaining, out of Fifty-Seven? You got to be kidding me. Lord Ashdown couldn't even see the now giant torpedo flying very low in the direction of his party. Poor man, he is a LibDem. They have some problems coping with reality. If this is true, he said, he would publicly eat his hat.
I hope Lord Ashdown likes hats for dinner; and I hope I will witness his public eating live. For the records, hats can be perfectly edible. One expects a man to keep his word. Even a LibDem politician.
Of the Fifty-Seven not quite ten, but, actually … only eight have survived. The Country has made a massacre of LibDem Members of Parliament in Charles Manson-style; but only after mass sodomisation, which even Charles Manson would have probably considered too cruel. The LibDems probably liked the last bit, as it must have showed them how many facettes – Clegg speaks French, remember! – the love of the British people for them has. They must feel very happy, and very gay, that they have been the objects of such an exercise in non-conventional love.
They were Fifty-Seven before the battle.
They knew they would be casualties, but this is worse than that.
This is not a defeat. This is not even a rout.
This is Afghan ritual disembowelling.
Why, then, does your truly feel the need to express his boundless enthusiasm at the gruesome news?
Firstly, because a party which was the most vocal proponent of so-called same sex marriage has received the Giant Dildo Treatment before their almost annihilation. I am not so naive to think it was because of their support for sexual perversion; but one takes the good news as they come.
Secondly, because David “Chameleon” Cameron will now be forced to fake Conservatism with more enthusiasm. Again, I do not expect a resurgence of Christian values, but I think that things are slowly moving in the right direction. Cameron isn't dumb. He knows he is now far less in control than he used to be, and can't use the LibDems as an excuse. He also knows that the knives meant for his back are, in purest Tory tradition, always sharp. He may be happy he is still in power, but he knows a PM is as strong as his charisma and following, and he clearly lacks both. The demise of the LibDems deprives him of one leg. He won't feel comfortable surrounded by an all-Tory team.
Thirdly, because the only halfway sane party in the Country, the UKIP, has garnered almost four million votes and is now very officially the third biggest party by number of voters. A development, this, that will send very cold shivers down the spine of many newly-elected Tory MPs, and will further contribute to a slow return to something vaguely resembling sanity. The UKIP only got one MP, I know; but I am one of those who think that the cruel first-past-the-post system in use in the UK forces MPs to think of their possible demise at the next election all the time. Ask Ed (cut) Balls if you don't believe me.
The Country went to sleep sensing a big surprise, and woke up with an ever bigger one; this afternoon, the surprise is staggeringly complete.
This Country has moved to the right in a way that even Cameron must find unwelcome. It is by far not enough, but it is a first step.
For the moment, let's enjoy this massacre. You never know what surprises the Lord has in store for us.
And pray, pray for this Country.
Once the Dowry of Mary, now the Whore of Elton
One of the many things that drive me mad of the secular press is this fashion of never mentioning the Church without mentioning the “scandals”.
Whilst the big problems are now around 30 years past, and the more recent problems (like Vatileaks) are embarrassing but nothing that will make Church history, it seems no journalist worth his hell can write an article about the upcoming Conclave without mentioning a Church “beset by scandals”.
Last time I looked, the last not one, but two German President had to resign due to a corruption scandal (Wulff) or grave controversies (Koehler). If this is not “beset by scandals”, I don’t know what is, and right at the top of the Institutions.
Or we want to say that the oh so anointed President of the United States is the political son (erm, bastard) of the most corrupt political machine existing in the United States, without any of his many admirers ever mentioning that he hails from Chicago, a town clearly “beset by scandals”.
In the meantime, France has a former President (Chirac) condemned to two years in prison (suspended, I grant, but you get the drift).
I will, for a human sense of patriotism, say nothing about Italy.
Summa summarum, it is not clear not me why the magic locution “beset by scandals” is almost never applied to the democratic institutions of modern abortionist Democracies, but is considered de rigueur whenever the Vatican is mentioned. Nor is this adjective applied very often to the BBC (whose men, women and people in the middle take the biscuit without discussion), or to the English educational system (worse percentage of suspected child abusers than the Church) or the so-called of England (same ballpark) or the NHS beset by malfunctions, scandals, and homicidal nurses. I will not even bore you with the Liberal Democrats, a party who seems to have made sexual perversion, creepy behaviour or perversion of justice a prerequisite to obtain positions of responsibility.
No, the NHS is such a great achievement of Socialism that it makes it to the opening ceremony of the Olympic games, but the Vatican can’t be mentioned without the “scandals” making it to the very same sentence.
I am, I must say, rather fed up. Particularly because this soundtrack will accompany us through the conclave, the election and the Easter celebrations which this year will, you can bet your pint, attract huge curiosity from the secular world because of the brand new Pope.
Seriously, the press office of the Vatican should say a couple of things on this, before the conclave begins.
I truly am sick and tired. Are you?
In a rather funny turn of event, Nick Clegg was forced to backpedal on the “bigot” slur he clearly wanted to express – tolerant as he is – and had to say something vaguely pathetic about it not being like him to call his opponents “bigots”. Try another one.
The official explanation is now that there were (for some reason) two drafts of the speech: the “good” one was approved by the oh so tolerant Clegg but, miraculously, there was also another one which was not approved but was – certainly because of the intervention of Mister Magoo, who had confused the two – distributed to the press instead. The excuse is neither intelligent nor original, and an apology would have been more dignified. Alas, it would not have been very much Lib-Dem.
If you do not live in the UK, you must understand Clegg’s remark from the background of a massive opposition to the so-called “gay marriage”, which caused Cameron’s stool to shake visibly and forced him to admit the matter is now, erm, on ice. Obviously, though – being this the man they call “Chameleon” – the unwanted policy remains wanted at the same time, in the sense that it is still official intention of the government to introduce a measure the biggest party in government flatly refuses. If you think this is too stupid to be true, please consider they have done the same with the reform of the Lords.
Now, Mr Clegg is at the moment struggling to give his supporters one single reason to justify his existence as the Chameleon’s girlfriend, and wants to show some muscle to the perverted troops and their supporters, constituting a stronghold of the Lib-Dem electorate. Therefore, the phrase
“Continued trouble in the economy gives the bigots a stick to beat us with, as they demand we ‘postpone’ the equalities agenda in order to deal with ‘the things that people really care about’.”
is perfectly to be expected and very much in tune with Clegg’s conception of being “liberal”. Please also note the speech was meant for an audience of committed friends of sexual perversion, and some spice therefore had to be delivered.
Alas, the embarrassingly inadequate Clegg has once again showed he is no material for a Deputy Prime Minister, let alone an MP.
On the other hand, he seems the born “liberal”.
To better explain to the overseas readership what a nincompoop the man is, I must go back some months, when the intrepid friends of the sodomites expressed himself like this:
We have a moral duty to the next generation to wipe the slate clean for them of debt. We have set out a plan – it lasts about six or seven years – to wipe the slate clean to rid people of the deadweight of debt that has been built up over time.
It is clear here that dear Deputy Prime Minister does not know the difference between public debt and structural deficit (which is what the government would like to get rid of in the next six or seven years; the mountain of debt will, of course, remain). But again, if you are a Lib-Dem these things do not even have to be a great embarrassment to you. Engage yourself more in favour of the sodomites and your utter incompetence in matters of… numeracy will be forgotten.
Or so he thought.