A Confession To My Readers
[EDIT: APRIL’S FOOL!!]
I have not written for a couple of days, because I needed the Easter days to do some serious reflection. I think it is now the time to share these reflections with you, in a spirit of honesty and peace.
Please do not judge me.
You see: living in England, I have more and more contacts with Muslim colleagues. In fact, I would say that I am now in daily contact with several of them. And some of them are males.
Now, I have had some very instructive discussions with one or two male Muslim colleagues about their expectations for the next life. They told me that, when they go to paradise, they will have an awful lot of good stuff: honey of the best quality, 1a-category strawberries (with whipped cream), Caffarel chocolate and all-butter biscuits. There will be tiramisu’ and millefoglie. Now, I absolutely love tiramisu’ and millefoglie!
They also told me they will have sex. A lot of it. You see, being a male, a part of me would (even if it is sinful) like to go through the Playboy Calendar Playmates, January to December, and then back, before moving to the following year’s Playboy Calendar Playmates, and so on and on…
I know, I know…
They told me it’s just what they will do! 72 Playmates, just for them, and I mean, literally, play-mates! No headaches, ever! Don’t let me say more, because I am read by pious women… They also told me something strange about the virginity of these women, but I wasn’t listening anymore, because that thing with the 72 playmates had taken all my attention by then.
And then I wondered: why can the Christian Paradise not be as exciting as the Muslim one? I mean, eternal happiness and all that is good, but what about the honey? And the strawberries? And the playmates? Will it not be a bit boring, or bland? Happy all the time, but without the millefoglie? Or the honey? What about a small collection of strippers?
Mind, I will certainly not convert to Islam. I believe in the Father and the Son and the Holy Ghost, period. But I can’t avoid thinking that the paradise of the Muslims is more exciting?
I mean, singing all the time? Is that as good as it gets?
What do you think?
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Posted on April 1, 2024, in Traditional Catholicism. Bookmark the permalink. 17 Comments.
Mundabor's Blog 
Happy April 1st!
Happy April Fool’s Day!
As I see it: The Muslim belief in the Afterlife revolves around goods of this world. Sensory things that we see right now.
Catholic belief sees it as, “Eye has not seen nor ear has heard what God has prepared for those who love Him”.
Not centered around the sensory things of this world, but so much more. The sensory things of this world will be useless. We no longer have “senses” without a body.
Thanks for the food for thought.
haha. April fool’s. I’ve read your blog too long. you would never convert to Islam.
this one isn’t even believable.
The belief of the Mussleman cannot move move beyond things of physical pleasure . The Christian knows that things of physical pleasure fail to satisfy us and that there is something beyond this world that we long for . Our Hearts are restless till they rest in thee.
God is other. This other is beyond the body and sex . It is the worship of God which Islam fails to seek. Our heaven worships God who is our being and all . Islam never moved beyond the physical.
The Christian believes in an ecstasy far beyond materialism pleasure, best expressed I think in the beautiful statue the Ecstasy of Saint Teresa.
ROFL, you had me for a minute….
Well, yesterday’s Easter High Mass probably had a reasonable sermon, but I could hardly hear it with all of the screaming babies, and I thought: this might be the last straw. What is the good of the sermon if you can’t hear it. So I’ve decided to go on a quest, not for a muslim paradise, but a feminist-friendly one. (Not too feminist because their shrieking is louder than the babies.) But just something friendly, where I can calmly doze through the 20 minute service and then out for a Starbucks. Sounds good!
April fools day
LOL! Happy April Fool’s Day. I’ll take the chocolate and strawberries and a big helping of Bach, Beethoven, Mozart, Vivaldi, and throw in some show tunes from Rogers and Hammerstein and Lerner and Leowe.
April Fool’s Day. 😉
Better to just convert. Don’t be lukewarm or hypocritical. Let your yes be yes.
According to some Islamic scholars ,it was 72 raisins but somehow got lost in translation. https://globalnation.inquirer.net/163694/raisins-not-virgins-quran-scholars-say
Happy April! You ain’t fooling me.
Amazing. But what about the heaven that is hoped for by western teenage girls, where they will get to worship Taylor Swift for all eternity and swap bracelets?
Suspecting your post is an April Fool’s day prank, but in case not …
The devil often seems to have the better PR strategy, which is particularly effective in attracting prideful, narcissistic, lustful men.
Reason it through.
1. What does Muslim paradise offer for women?
2. Where do the massive numerical excess of willing women in Muslim paradise come from?
3. It appears that the women in Muslim paradise are merely objects of delight and satisfaction for the men there, or did your female Muslim colleague(s) confirm that they were looking forward to such service for eternity?
4. What possible purpose could genitive acts serve, “divorced” from genitive ends, other than pleasure for one or both of the participants?
5. What role does the Muslim Allah have in the Muslim paradise? Is he merely a spectator, or an enabler, or an active participant – perhaps picking some of the best “playmates” for his own pleasure?
6. In what way does the Muslim paradise appeal to the higher faculties of man and woman, rather than the baser physical pleasures, which are barely distinguishable from animal instincts?
7. Wouldn’t any of the “performers” tire of this Muslim paradise after some days, weeks, months, years, decades, centuries, millennia …? What then?
Mundabor, what did you eat yesterday? Do you need to check your blood sugar? Aquinas tells us that we all get one mansion! I think they come with a karaoke room. We’re set!
Singing in my church choir, with several comely young ladies in close proximity, including during these penitential days of Great Lent full prostrations, seems to betoken the best of both worlds, IMHO.