FrancisCandidate Butt-Igg-Igg Has No Chance

The Primaries are getting nearer, and the Homo FrancisCandidate Buttigieg (remember! It’s Butt-igg-igg! He is always very particular about it!) is slowly emerging as the first one behind…  the first three. This makes some headlines, because the guy is a sodomite, and the leftist press loves to write about sodomites.

So, let us see in a very factual way what the chances of this guy (they never tell us if he is “the girl”; but there are things you are better off not knowing…) are.

He is the first a long distance after three candidates with some distinctive traits: very old (Biden), very leftist (Warren), or both (Sanders). Warren might tank when the primaries go to the Southern States on Super Tuesday. Joe’s state of brain decomposition is worrying even his dog, and the problems he has (Ukraine, China, and general hair-sniffing creepiness) make of him an ideal adversary for Trump. Sanders has been endorsed by three quarters of the Squad and is, therefore, dead for electoral purposes. Apart from the fact that he could be…. really dead at any point during the campaign that already gave him a heart attack.

This is, I think, another reason why Butt-igg-igg attracts attention: he could be the Comeback Fag if the other three start to implode.

Still, Pete has no chance.

Whilst he keeps increasing his support among Whites looking for the next way to signal virtue, Blacks do not have the same mentality. The guy would be trounced by the Southern blacks, and would be ignored by the non religious ones. There is no chance that he can suddenly win the Black vote, and with that there is no chance that he may ever win this election, however strong his support among Whites and, one day (I am being generous here), Latinos. The guy is running on, so to speak, a “fashion factor”, because Butt Damage is fashionable nowadays. But no, his “brand” is such that it will only appear to a well-defined segment of the voting population.

Plus, he is number four. This means that three other candidates still gather much more support than him. Even if they were to implode (say: Biden goes out of the race, Sanders dies, Warren is impaled by a mob of angry, real Redskins), Buttigieg would only be the bad surrogate of already not viable candidates.

Not good, Pete.

Lastly, I wanted to mention a non-candidate (yet): Michael Bloomberg. Whilst he has not yet announced, I think he will run. I do not think he has any chance against Trump (Bloomberg is too rich, too elitist, too nanny-ing, too much of an enemy of the Second Amendment, and even too much of an Enviro-Nutcase). Still, the man is very rich, and he will spend vast amounts of his own money in the Southern States. Come Super Tuesday, Buttigieg will have to fight against another candidate who is still more electable than he is, and who has the money to let everybody know.

It’s not happening.

Still, Pete The Butt has already achieved what he wanted: he has propelled himself from relative obscurity to the limelight of White Progressive Journalism, where a small number of people are persuaded that the entire nation thinks like them and even cares about what they write. It will be enough for higher office than Mayor one day.

There is a future for Pillow Biter Pete.

Just not at the White House.