Strange Dreams

I had a dream.

There was a beautiful room in Rome, with a big table.

On the one side, there were a handful of Cardinals, with an Oh So Very Gay Cardinal Schoenborn in the middle. Yes, in my dream the Cardinal was very “gay”. I cannot answer for my dreams…

What was I saying? Oh yes…

They were all in full regalia, and I knew in my dream it was to stress the importance of their position. No humbleness there. I am sure in real life they are all very humble, and not inverted at all.

On the other side of the table, there was a handful of old people. I could not recognise their faces, but I knew (this being a dream) that they were very wealthy donors in representation of worldwide very wealthy donors.

“How did you dare to do that, gentlemen?” Asked a peeved Schoenborn, his voice a tad more shrill than befits a Cardinal. Any cardinal, much less a noble one.

“We know the Holy Ghost will provide a solution in His own time”, said a guy with a strange nose vaguely resembling J P Morgan (hey, it was a dream….)

“What do you mean by that”, replied the Gay Cardinal. “You have cut down to zero all your donations!” On the side of the table, Cardinal Coccopalmerio was all excited, watching some pics of the Sistine Chapel, he said. Torsos were clearly visible, but no one was interested.

“Of course we did”, replied Catholic J P Morgan. “You don’t expect us to support a bunch of sodomites and paedos, surely? There aren’t so very many of us and each of us knows many others. It wasn’t difficult, you know…”

Gay Cardinal was not very gay now. Near him, Cardinal Farrell was mumbling “nighty-night, dear…” for the 14th time in 20 minutes, with a dreamy face; but in my dream no-one cared for him, either.

“Difficult, my elbow!!” Said the Cardinal excitedly. “You make 80% of our worldwide income and you know that!”

“The Holy Ghost will come out with a solution in His own time”, said Big Nose, as calm as an undertaker on Valium.

Gay Cardinal was having the conniptions. “YOU CAN’T SAY THAT! THE HOLY GHOST WANTS ***YOU*** TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM! DO YOUR DAMN JOB AND SUPPORT THE CHURCH, YOU…. YOU….”

Here the Cardinal stopped, because he realised another Austrian before him had managed to make a huge mess by just not being reflective enough. Besides, an Edelmann like him should not scream to the commoners like a fishwife. Noblesse oblige, and all that….

Big Nose was peace itself. His tone was calm and measured, but with just that bit of steel that says “You raise your voice again with me, you little queen, and I will take care you end up cleaning toilets in one of those saunas…” . He made a meaningful pause, ensured he had all the attention of the Gay Nobleman, and said: “Do your damn job, you say, Your Grace? Don’t you think this should start exactly from you, the Cardinals? See, we have read all those articles about doing nothing in the midst of rampant heresy, because this would be the will of the Holy Ghost, Who will put an end to this without the need for the Cardinals to act…. and we thought that well, if it applies to them, why not to us? Do you follow me, Your Grace?”

The Cardinal was very red in the face now. I thought he was about to explode…

Sadly, I woke up at this point.

What a strange dream, I thought.

But not stupid.

Not stupid at all.

M